Life is good

I never blog anymore; I just don't have the time for it. But today I have a rare, brief moment. My dear husband took the little one (now 5 months old- almost 6 months!) to the store while I put the big one (he'll be 3 in August!) down to nap. Life is good. I never envisioned myself having kids, and now I have 2 delightful ones. I always thought kids were a possibility, I just couldn't picture what it would be like. I am always amazed at how those cliches you hear are so true: you never realized you could love someone so much. They change everything. I am different now. It's amazing to me.
Work is good, but hectic. My duties have changed and I am working on a big and exciting project. It is stretching me and forcing me to grow. Growth hurts, but I suppose in the long run I'll be happy for it.
Husband is great. He is running his own private psych practice in Maryville. It isn't easy but it is rewarding. He loves what he does, and I am so proud of him.
I could go on and on and on. There is so much to say; so much has changed. But I think I'll just leave it at this for now. I am happy with my life. :)

So much is going on...

I haven't posted in a long time because I have changed job duties at work and I've just been too busy and then too tired to post. So I am not going to go into a lot of detail here, but basically, here's a few things that have been going on.

• I am no longer a Reference Librarian. I am the Team Leader of our library's Electronic Resources Management and Acquisitions team. That's a mouthful, eh? It has been hard so far, but good. I am learning a TON and I work with great people, so that really helps. It is a coordinating position, but it's not technically a supervisory role, so I am not responsible for performance evaluations and all that jazz. I am doing a lot of Interlibrary Loan work, too, which is kind of fun and rewarding in a weird kind of way. I have been stressed but I think I'll really like this job once I get a better handle on what I'm doing.
• The Baby had his 9 month doctor's visit today. It was eventful. He isn't crawling yet, or even pulling himself up to standing position. He doesn't do a good job of resting on his hands and knees. The doctor is kind of concerned. He isn't super behind or anything, but the doc wants to be sure there isn't a problem. I am in favor of early interventions, so I'm glad he is concerned, but I was already worried about Reed Baby not crawling yet, and so now I am really worried! The doctor wanted to send Reed for an ultrasound of his back, just to make sure there wasn't anything wrong. But when the doctor's office checked with the place that does baby ultrasounds, they learned that you really couldn't see much with ultrasounds for babies this size in that area of the body. So they suggested an MRI. Because there is some risk associated with MRI's and he would have to be put under, we decided to wait. Our pediatrician is consulting with someone else, who will try to see Reed and give a second opinion before we do anything else. In the meantime, maybe he will make more progress toward crawling and the additional tests will not be necessary. While we were at the doc, they also drew blood for routine blood work and gave some vaccines (more Hep B and polio vaccines). So after we got home from taking Baby back to daycare, the doctor's office called. His preliminary blood work came back showing him borderline anemic. Our doc is going out of town later this week so they wanted us to go to Children's Hospital to get more blood work done, so that our doc could get the results before going out of town. So I went BACK to daycare, got Reedster, took him to Children's, where they put the saddest little tube in his arm to draw blood (he screamed, yay), then took him back to daycare and now I'm pooped. We should get the results soon though. At least if he IS anemic, that should be pretty easy to 'fix,' right?? I shouldn't worry, right? Well, biblically speaking I shouldn't worry anyways but that is beside the point. I am trusting it will all be fine.
• One day a couple weeks ago I forgot to take my Prozac. The next day, I didn't have time to take it. So by the third day, I thought, "you know, I really feel OK and it wouldn't be such a bad thing to just not be on prozac anymore..." so I just quit taking it. That was probably a really bad idea. You aren't supposed to quit stuff like that cold turkey. I should have been weaning myself off of it, but I just want to be done with it. So it's been a rough couple weeks. I don't want to go into how rough, but I just want to remind myself and anyone that is reading this: don't do what I did. If you don't want to be on your prozac anymore, talk to your doc about how to go off it without turning into a crazy person. Don't be like me. It is not fun to cry at stupid stuff.
• I got to go to Alabama to see my fabulous sister and her family. My goddaughter was getting confirmed, and I got to be her sponsor. It was a great experience-- so glad to get to see my family and eat delicious food and hang out. I left the baby at home with Charles but we are planning a trip soon so we can all go visit. 

OK there is so much more that I could write but I have stuff to do, so I'm gonna wrap this up. I hope everyone else is well! :)

Hobbies

I don't have too many hobbies; I have not been active in Martial Arts since having the baby, and really the Baby is my biggest 'hobby' at the moment, even though he is much more than a hobby. :) I have gotten to read a little in the past week, and am almost caught up on Downton Abbey, almost caught up on Sherlock, and a little behind in Doctor Who. I enjoy watching TV and surfing the Internet-- mostly Pinterest and Reddit. However, Charles and I were talking a few days ago about what hobbies we would like to have if time and money permitted. His thinking was that we should go ahead and plan to have hobbies, then let Reed participate as he is able and interested.
The number one hobby that I wish I could adopt is fitness. I would love to start running, do more martial arts, maybe learn some yoga. I'd love to be more active. I adore eating, and if I had a more active lifestyle, the eating wouldn't take as much of a toll on me. ;) I think fitness is something that Charles and Reed and I can all do together.
But the second hobby that I really wish I could devote some time to is quilting! Talking to my sister, Sarah, and reading the Inspire Me Grey blog really motivate me to want to learn to sew and quilt! I have so many ideas for things I want to make, and just no way to make them manifest. On the topic of quilting, check out this awesome Woodlands themed nursery. (By the way, Sarah, I looked up the Downton Abbey fabric and not too impressed...)
Then I have these fantasy hobbies that are really unlikely to happen. Like archery and taxidermy, silver smithing and carpentry.... Let's face it- it's just not going to happen. But I love to think about hobbies and daydream!

Uphill in the snow...

Yesterday I wasn't feeling very well. Mostly I was just feeling exhausted, run-down, and frazzled. I needed a break. I decided to do something which I hardly ever do-- take part of the day off just to rest. Seriously, this never happens, especially not now that I have a baby. But I thought I'd go home, leave Reed at daycare for a little while, and just rest to fight off a cold that I feel coming on. But after I decided to leave work, and before I got a chance to leave, it began to snow. Snow never really happens in Knoxville. It's pretty rare, and even more rare for it to stick. So I left work around 10am, and it was really coming down! I got close to Reed's daycare and felt very conflicted. Should I go on and pick him up? I decided that since the snow was sticking, I probably ought to. It's a good thing I did, because they ended up announcing that the daycare was going to close early, at 1:00. Charles was on his way home from work, too, but traffic was just crawling and the roads were getting quite bad. I stupidly decided that Reed and I could drive through Chick-fil-A for some food before heading home. Well that probably took 20 minutes. By the time we got to our neighborhood, there were already cars parking at the bottom of the hill in our neighborhood, and a school bus stuck partially up the hill. I spoke with some people that discouraged me from trying to make it up the hill. So I parked along the street with several other people-- maybe 8 or 10 other cars. I sat in the car and ate my Chick-fil-A with the heat on, then bundled up my baby, grabbed my essentials (purse, pumped breastmilk, cell phone), and trekked up the steep hill in the snow with Reed and his heavy-ass carrier in tow. I knew that the carrier was heavy with him in it but I have a whole new appreciation for that now! Nice people offered to help me by offering blankets and asking if he was OK, though no one actually offered to help me carry him. Oh well, I probably would've been too stubborn to let them anyways. Everyone I encountered was very friendly and cheerful, despite the chaotic weather and parking conditions. Someone even said, "This will be a great story for him when he's older! How you carried him home in the snow, uphill!" :)
We made it home safely and I was pleased to see that Reed was having a great time. His little nose was a little red but he was bright eyed and smily. When I got in the house I was glad to find that Charles's Chick-fil-A food was still slightly warm so I put it in the microwave for him. When he got home, he was actually able to get his car up the hill and into the carport, so I decided to go back for my car. The road had improved a bit and I was able to get my car home, and we had a nice day snuggled up inside, watching episodes of Scrubs on Netflix. It was kind of an exciting day, but I was glad things ended well. :)

De-clutter Brag

Well I brought home an armful of stuffed animals from my Dad's house. 5 so far. 2 of which are in such bad shape that I don't feel they can be donated, and 3 of which were not only in OK shape but were nostalgic enough that I think they have a good shot at being 'adopted' once I donate them. Charles and I took photos of them all so I could remember them. Then the 3 that were in decent shape went to the Knoxville Area Rescue Ministries donation center. The other 2 are still sitting at home, waiting to be disposed of. It makes me sad, but I just need to start letting go of things that don't make me feel fantastic. The photos will be enough to remember them by. I really want for my baby Reed to get to have his own toys and special things, and not be bogged down by things that used to belong to me. When I am old or dead I don't want him to have to make the decision to part with my things-- I want to live a life that is clutter free and happy and restful. I want to model good behavior for him. Even though he is currently too young to learn from my de-cluttering behavior, it is good practice for me. So even though the task is not done, I am proud of myself for taking steps in the right direction.

I also disposed of lots of papers from college that I had been hanging onto mostly for a sake of having the 'complete set.' It was kind of like I was thinking it would be cool to have EVERY paper, note, reading, etc from undergrad. Well I let go of that attitude over the long weekend and kept only a few papers from classes that I really enjoyed. I even parted with one of my old Japanese text books, because if the time comes (and I hope it will) that I want to re-learn Japanese, I will probably have better tools at my disposal. And a partially completed workbook that already has some answers filled in is not going to help me learn. So I am proud of myself for taking steps toward my goal. They are baby steps, but by blogging about it and patting myself on the back, I am hoping to reinforce the behavior and make it more likely that I will continue. :)

Dr. Charles

Charles officially graduated in August, but yesterday we went to the commencement and hooding ceremony. It was great! I took Reed Baby with me, we picked up Charles's mom, and met Charles's father and stepmom there, and also saw Charles's grandmother. The ceremony was about 2 hours, and Reed slept through pretty much the whole thing! He did startle awake a couple times, but he accepted the pacifier and went right back to sleep. It was great to see Charles get hooded by Dr. Williams. Afterwards we went down to the floor and took some pictures and spoke briefly with Dr. Williams, who really bragged on what an outstanding student Charles was. I talked with a couple other folks and showed off the baby. Then I drove Char's mom back to her place and went to meet up with our families for dinner at Bravo! It's a great Italian restaurant in Bearden. Unfortunately Char's mom was unable to make it to dinner, but we were joined by 2 of my siblings, Rebecca and Joseph, and my dad. It was great. People gifted Charles with stuff and cards, Reed fussed a bit (think he is teething) but then fell back asleep. The food and conversation were great. It was just nice to have everybody come together to celebrate Charles's fantastic accomplishment.
Eventually I will try to post some pictures, including a picture of  Charles's graduation quilt!

Everybody have a great day!

Christmas Time

My boss just shared with me a devotional from his church's webpage (http://www.cspc.net/devotionals/dec11?fullsite=2) that REALLY struck a chord with me. I am sharing it here.

First Corinthians 13- Christmas Version

If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows,
strands of twinkling lights and shiny balls,
but do not show love to my family,
I'm just another decorator.
If I slave away in the kitchen,
baking dozens of Christmas cookies,
preparing gourmet meals
and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime:
but do not show love to my family,
I'm just another cook.
If I work at a soup kitchen
carol in the nursing home,
and give all that I have to charity;
but do not show love to my family,
it profits me nothing.
If I trim the spruce with shimmering angels
and crocheted snowflakes,
attend a myriad of holiday parties
and sing in the choir's cantata
but do not focus on Christ,
I have missed the point.
Love stops the cooking to hug the child.
Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the spouse.
Love is kind, though harried and tired.
Love does not envy another's home
that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.
Love does not yell at the kids to get out of the way,
but is thankful they are there to be in the way.
Love does not give only to those who are able to give in return; but rejoices in giving to those who cannot.

Love bears all things,
believes all things,
hopes all things, and
endures all things.
Love never fails.
Video games will break,
pearl necklaces will be lost,
golf clubs will rust;
but giving the gift of love will endure.

Attributed to Sharon Jaynes, taken from "Celebrating a Christ Centered Christmas"

www.sharonjaynes.com

 

 

Wow, it was really what I needed to see today. I wonder how he knew that I needed that? I have been dealing with the usual holiday blahs. We have a Christmas party at work today, and another one on Friday, but I am feeling kind of down about myself. Feeling like a terrible mom and terrible person. The holidays are so much fun-- I love decorating the tree and eating tasty food and all that, but at the same time I feel so empty and lonely. I think constantly of those that have less than I do. There are homeless people, abused people, the poor, the depressed, the sick, the alone.... I can't get them out of my mind. I am just going to try to focus on the reason for Christmas. No amount of worrying will help those people, so I will just do what I can and trust that they will be taken care of.